links for 2010-08-13

13 Aug
  • Here are those five things you should NEVER say to your spouse:
    1. It's your fault!
    2. I told you so!
    3. Saying "I am upset with you about this or that . . . ." in a public setting.
    4. Why do you always . . . Focusing on your spouse's weakness rather than building on their strengths will only increase their weakness and diminish their strength. This habit can send a relationship into a downward spiral if weaknesses are pointed out and commented upon. Success does breed success. Stick with the strengths and don't focus on weakness.

    5. Ask for your spouse's opinion and then do the opposite. We have heard from many angry divorced or almost divorced couples that this is the greatest indicator of "disrespect." If you ask where your spouse wants to go to dinner and he/she suggests a couple of places, then you select a different one, by your actions you said, "I do not respect your opinion and don't care what you think!"

Posted by on August 13, 2010 in Uncategorized


2 responses to “links for 2010-08-13

  1. Shefaly

    August 14, 2010 at 11:35 am

    I think no. 5 misses a trick. The point should be that one mustn’t work in simplex Tx-Rx mode with a partner or spouse. An important decision, such as one worth getting upset about by either party, should be made jointly, discursively. Further a long term relationship is a supergame, or a repeated game if you will. One has to be able to understand this profound reality and its impact on the reputation of the two persons and the outcomes/ payoffs.

    Besides, if X asks Y for recommendations, and Y proposes 6 things, and X picks a 7th, how does that compute to being “opposite” of anything?

    • Just Mohit

      August 15, 2010 at 12:31 pm

      I think the post linked to is a little OTT to make a point. The point being that if it’s a repeated trend, then it definitely is a sign of disrespect. In any relationship in fact, if you ask for advice, and repeatedly choose to ignore it, you are insulting the intelligence of the person giving it. In spousal relationships, it can cause serious long-term damage.


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